So you’ve bid for a contract and been informed that your company will need to make an appearance in person to present the company and the proposal. This is usually ranked and compared against your competition in the bidding process. You’ll need to do this a number of times each year, so it’s good to know how to give an amazing presentation that will blow the socks off your client and win that contract without promising a single thing.
First, being the busy executive you are, you’ll need to make sure you set the right expectations by rescheduling the meeting at least once due to a business trip to China or something similar. It’s all about the illusion of being someone very important with any number of other things to do. When you finally present yourself they will be ecstatic you were able to take some time away and grace them with your presence.
Second – you need to roll into that meeting looking like Al Capone. Get your finest suit on, lather yourself thickly in your poignant cologne, and grab the keys to the blackest German car you can find. The sense of awe and mystique you impress on your client-to-be as you and your entourage strut into the building dressed to kill should be enough to win them over before you even start on your PowerPoint presentation.
Once your client gets the meeting started, make sure that you gain control of the room immediately. Their objective is to move through their checklist and rate you on each of their meaningless categories. This is undesirable as it puts your company in direct competition with other companies on a scale that clearly is not designed for a failing business. You’ll need to run the meeting on your terms so you can wow your client on nothing but the hot air coming out of your mouth.
Throughout the presentation you need to bait your client into absolutely loving you.
For the ladies this is exceptionally easy: Get close to your client and let them bask in your intoxicating aroma as you let your handshake linger. Give them a kiss on the cheek as a formal greeting and feel them quiver longingly. You are a dream to these people, an image they will think about during the day at their desk, a smell they long for when they go home to their husband, a low deep rumble of a high-powered engine that makes their stomach tingle as you drive away high-fiving your team after landing the deal.
Fast cars are a win at meetings
For the men in the meeting they will want to talk about the exceptionally built piece of German engineering that you rolled up in. You’ve taken our advice about buying cars seriously and you made sure to get 8 cylinders and a turbocharger. Guys love this. Let them sit in your car and dream about driving down the strip with an anorexic model in a mini-skirt on the plush Italian leather seat beside them. Let them just imagine what a day in your world would be like and they will hire your company just to get closer to you.
Once you have your their tongues wagging and their eyes have glazed glazed over in a prepubescent comatose state you can start dropping buzzwords like they are going out of style; ‘portals’, ‘nanotechnology’, ‘Web 2.0′, ‘Frameworks, modules, and plugins’, and of course ‘Cloud Computing’ are all fair game right now. Their heads will nod and their minds will be transformed with the golden nuggets of knowledge falling from your lips filling the conference room.
You can now safely wrap up your presentation and start your exit. As you leave the conference room, tell a joke and have everyone laughing on their way to the front door where you will inevitably pass the next company waiting to give their presentation. As your entourage and your client walk by laughing and hanging on your very coattails make sure to catch the eye of that other company and give them an ear to ear smile and a wink. They will be terrified to take the stage after you leave the building.
Now that you have the contract, check out how to manage the project without delivering a thing
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